It’s funny how sometimes you’re cruising along feeling like you’ve got the new “normal” on lock, and then one day life just knocks you completely on your ass.

Yesterday was that day for me.

So today I’m taking the day off social and focusing on some self-care to try to get myself back in balance. I’ve been needing to do this more and more often as 2020 throws new layers of stress our way.

This week, I’ve noticed the topic of burnout cropping up here and there around the interwebs. I get it—I’ve been struggling with burnout myself. It’s hard to stay engaged and active after hours of consuming (mostly bad) news and scrolling intense Instagram posts.

I’ve always thought that consistent self-care is an act of rebellion in a society that tells women they need to give and nurture until they collapse. But now more than ever, self-care is a meaningful act. A political act. A statement that you are worth caring for. And an essential part of staying mentally and physically healthy enough to continue pushing forward with the work that needs doing.

Because holy shit is there a lot of work that needs doing. We’ve got a racist president to eject from the White House. Systematic racism that we must continue to dismantle. Introspection to do on our role in the current status quo and how to move forward differently.

We can’t afford to burn out. We can’t afford to let ourselves become numb and apathetic. We have to be proactive in taking extra good care of ourselves so that we have the energy to keep putting one foot in front of the other on the path to justice and equality.

In that spirit, here’s our guide to taking care of yourself--body, mind and spirit--in these stressful times. Take what resonates with you and leave what doesn’t. Add your own strategies in the comments. And please share with anyone you think could use a little extra (self-)love right now.

**The Lionesse Guide to Caring for Your Beautiful-Ass Self**

#1 Take a break from technology

Getting off your devices (hard as it is) goes a long way towards helping you get back in alignment. Plus you can’t be obsessively checking the news if you’re not glued to your phone or computer.

Turn your phone and computer off. Set a timer if it makes you anxious to do this for too long.
If you can’t stand to turn your devices off or need them for work, uninstall social media and news apps (I do this every day after posting and engaging for a little while).
Turn off all push notifications. This helps you be intentional about when/how you want to engage.

#2 Create a safe space

The world is feeling crazy right now. Creating a calming, predictable space inside your home can help you turn off feelings of hypervigilance, anxiety and fear

If mess makes you feel anxious, set aside 30-60 minutes to straighten your space so it feels harmonious.
Designate a corner of your home as the Comfort Zone and deck it out with the comfiest throws and pillows you have. The cozier, the better.
Add candles, incense or a scent diffuser if you want.
Play chill music.
Wear your most comfortable clothing: Silk pajamas. That old concert tee from 2005. Whatever makes you feel unconstricted and relaxed.
Spend some time cuddling your pet if you have one.

#3 Care for your physical self

We are all spending so much time in our heads--consuming information, analyzing, fretting. Getting into your body is key to staying grounded and balanced.

Move your body. And by this I do not mean “crush a workout” (unless you truly have the energy and it makes you feel good). The last thing you need right now is to punish yourself with fitness! So choose an activity that you enjoy and that’s easy to do. Pro tip: You can never go wrong with walking. It’s easy on your body and clears your mind. And dancing--in any form--can be super freeing.
Eat nourishing food. Notice I didn’t say “healthy”? I don’t want you punishing yourself with a bunch of shoulds here. Ask yourself: “What does my body need today to feel good?” and eat that. Maybe it’s a kale salad. Maybe it’s chocolate cake. Think in terms of caring for yourself and not “good” or “bad”.
Hydrate. If you don’t like plain water, try infused water (cucumber mint is my fave) or iced herbal tea.
Take a bath or shower.
Give yourself a home spa treatment. If you’re feeling run down, a face mask, mani/pedi or hair treatment can help you feel beautiful and radiant again
Take a nap. If you hate napping (like I do) try downing a coffee then setting a timer for 25 minutes. That’s the perfect amount of time to wake up feeling mentally refreshed and the caffeine will be hitting just as you do so you won’t feel groggy.
Masturbate or have sex. Sex is good for you on so many levels. And the feel-good chemicals it releases will help keep you feeling healthy and happy
Get enough sleep. This one is priceless. If your sleep is shit, your life is shit. Do it.

#4 Do something that brings you joy

Take a mini-vacation by reading a really good book. Preferably something non-political so you can truly unplug. Here’s the NYT 100 Notable Books of 2019 list if you need some ideas.
Cook. And it doesn’t have to be anything as fussy or time-consuming as sourdough. Dig out a favorite recipe from your childhood or open a cookbook you’ve been meaning to cook from. Make sure you have enough time to cook at a leisurely pace.
Pour yourself your a drink. Let it work its boozy magic on your brain and muscles.
Sit outside. Feel the sun and wind on your skin. Maybe with that drink you poured yourself. Or that really good book you’re reading. Or both.
Grow green things. It can be as simple as a pot of herbs in your kitchen window. There’s something about watching plants grow that’s both grounding and deeply satisfying. I’ve got a post on the journal about how gardening has been my go-to stress reliever lately.
Get crafty. Making something with your own two hands is its own kind of mindfulness practice. Plus it gets you off your phone. Try the thing you’ve always wanted to learn-- knitting, hand-lettering, soap making. There are tons of books and online tutorials to get you started.
Buy yourself flowers. A giant, beautiful bouquet. You’re worth it.

#5 Connect with other human beings

Isolation is kryptonite to mental health. Reach out to friends and family in whatever way feels good to you

If your local guidelines allow, schedule a (socially distanced) walk, coffee or drink with friends.
If you live with friends or family, set aside a block of quality time. A date. A dinner. A backyard play session with your kids. Put your phone away and be present.
Call or Facetime someone you love. No texting.
If you’re unable to see friends and family in person, hop on a Zoom. For extra good times, make it a cocktail party.

#6 And/or take some time alone

If you’re an introvert who spends their days on Zoom meetings or at home with someone who does, I see you. This one is especially important for you.

If you and your partner are both working from home, ask for some alone time to recharge and recenter. Ask your partner to go for a long walk or drive if businesses in your area are closed.
If you have kids, ask your partner to take the kids for a given amount of time. Or send them outside to play so you can have a little breathing room.

#7 Take care of your mind

We are all suffering from stress right now. Be sure to take some time to clear it out so it doesn’t build up and boil over.

Journal to get your feelings out or set your intentions.
Meditate. If you need some help, download an app like Headspace to get you going.
Breathe. Even just 3 deep breaths can break the cycle of panic and anxiety.
Let go of guilt. It’s so easy to feel like you could/should be doing more. Or that taking the time to care for yourself is frivolous or a waste of time. I guarantee you it’s not. Caring for yourself in meaningful ways is one of the most powerful things you can do right now to support yourself, your family and your community.

Self-Care as an Act of Rebellion

The Lionesse Guide to Caring for Your Beautiful-Ass Self